It is amazing how little twists and turns in our lives can make a difference. There was so much material I want to share with my readers that I sort of wanted to bypass beginning excerpts from the Epilogue and continue with recanting some of the vital occurrences during this time in my life. However, there was more than enough to accomplish both at the same time. So you have the best of both worlds. And if it has helped just one individual then it was well worth it.

I found this George Bernard Shaw from his Man and Superman, Dedicatory letter. It encapsulated my feelings in the latter part of my life. At this juncture, anything that bills up your ego, self-esteem and makes you feel that you have control over your bodily functions for as long as, or far as you can, has got to be a placebo.

“It recognizes true joy in life and perceiving yourself as a mighty one; a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to make you happy.” That’s something to get by without feeling sorry for yourself.

The next sentence captures what I was feverishly doing all these years trying to avoid being a selfish little clod. That my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live, it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can.

In finality, here is another inherent theme that wholeheartedly agrees with me. Before the end, to thoroughly use myself before leaving, as was written, the harder I work, the more I live. As George Bernard Shaw states, “I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.”


Figure #E.1 George Bernard Shaw from Man and Superman, Dedicatory Letter

June 11, 1998

Just a Little Too Late

“I can sing of death, I’ve seen a lot of it… But I’m obsessed with life. I’ve seem that dark place. I fight the beast in me every day. I’ve won a few rounds with God’s help. And that’s what matters most to me now – – feeling good about my relationship with God.” Johnny Cash

I never thought about my relationship with God, I just assumed that I had one and that it was good. Now and then I thought about family values – but I never had doubts that I had family values. They were good and they were strong.

I never had too many thoughts about having imbued my children with family values. I seem to have taken it for granted that they had the same feelings, the same doubts, the same feelings of being fair, and being honest the best that we knew how.

What was the best way to tackle your relationship with God your family values, that my parents instilled in us and we weren’t aware that this was happening. We never sat down and discussed our problems. You see, they did not speak English, and we conversed in Latino (a form of Spanish). I do not recall having deep conversations. I do not recall having deep conversations with my one brother and five sisters. Like aliens in spaceships, we found that this most important thing in our lives was transferred to us painlessly.


 Figure #E.2  Dissertation on “Your relationships, to G-d  Recurring themes of going off to war, and Surviving Letter

 We show our children by example who we want them to become.

“We need to realize that we are our children’s first and best teachers when we are selfish or inconsiderate, when we mistreat our wives or girlfriends, when we cut corners or failed to control our tempers, our children learn from this —and it’s no surprise when we see those behaviors in our schools or on our streets.”

But it also works the other way around. Work hard, treat others with respect, spend within our means, and contribute to our communities, those are the lessons our children learn. And that is what so many fathers are doing every day coaching soccer and Little League, going to those school assemblies and parent-teacher conferences, scrimping and saving and working that extra ship so the kids can go to college. They are fulfilling the most fundamental duties for this: to show the children by example, the kind of people they want them to become.


Epilogue #E.2 Father’s Day message from Pres. Barack Obama, Parade magazine June 21, 2009

In closing out final Captain’s Log entries on the Starship Sefekar, I’m emphasizing what makes for a life worth remembering; is not just a good thing. It is working hard at the goals that you set and it is always beneficial, working with others. You will find sharing and caring as trite as these adages are, maximizes your mission and enhances your results. And if it’s worth remembering, it is worth taking the time to keep these memories secured. And Lord knows, I have secured a lot of stuff; we haven’t even touched the hundred, yes 100 Kodak carousel trays, full of slides. That will be in my next lifetime, so stick around.

As we become more capable of saving pictures, documents, tapes and video, it is becoming easier to keep a lifetime of memoirs intact. Don’t put off making this concerted project. Keep your loved ones apprised of your intentions, as they most likely want to hear what you have say about it and what you’re doing about it.

The secret is that it isn’t a secret at all. Having a life partner to work with and share this with is the key. She has been my key and it’s opened up so many doors that it made a heavenly life here on earth.







Copyright © 2016      William Sefekar


** Material will appear in book.


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